Archive for the ‘2012 Goals’ Category

Husband and wife

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Welcome to my next installment of forced accountability through blogging!  No, really, that isn’t my only goal :).  This is my first year being very intentional about my goal setting.  Not just talking, but planning and writing down.  Making sure my goals are both measurable and attainable.

With the help of the book Tell Your Time, I have identified nine major roles in my life that deserve my attention.  My roles are:

  • Myself
  • Wife
  • Parent
  • Homeschooler
  • Home Manager
  • Friend
  • Worshipper of God
  • Business Owner
  • Dreamer
This post is focusing on my role as wife.  Remember, my goal setting began by asking myself the question, “What kind of wife do I want to be?”  I want to be a forgiving, gentle, supportive, helpful and fun wife.  I want to be my husband’s soft place to fall.  I want to someday look back on seventy years of marriage and know that I honored the Lord with this role, and blessed my husband.
Honestly, I am really humbled when I think how far I need to come in this category.  My husband is so loving and so gracious, that he would probably say I am already these things.  But, I know better, and so does Jesus.  I want to do better.
So, with an end goal that, to me, is very intimidating because of how far I need to come, I need to start small.  Remember, my goals need to be as measurable and attainable as possible, so that I have a way of assessing my progress.  Here is what I have come up with:
  • Thursday Morning Meetings – Sounds really romantic, doesn’t it?  Well, we take what we can get :)!  My husband’s work schedule is completely unpredictable, but he is almost always home on weekday mornings.  We have carved out this time (this was his idea!) to set aside for each other.  Thursday mornings, from 9:30 to 11:30, is our time.  (The baby is with us for the first half hour, but then she goes down for a nap.  The older four are in a bedroom together listening to an audio book and playing.  Training your children to play well together is priceless!)  Sometimes we just talk.  Usually we pray.  We are reading a book together, so sometimes we read a chapter and discuss things.  It is just a time to make sure that we are coming together at least once a week just to stay connected.  If there are things on my heart or mind, I can save them for this time.  So far, I am loving it!
  • Holding My Tongue – Well, I wish I could say I am making great strides here.  I too often voice what I think at the time are my thoughts, when in hindsight, they are merely criticisms.  I want to change that.  I have been praying for awareness of this habit prior to speaking so that I can more readily exercise control.  By the grace of God!
  • Reading Scripture and Books about Being a Wife – My daily time in the Word and in prayer brings me back, every morning, to where my focus needs to be.  God speaks to me about my habits, my behaviors, and my ways of thinking, and leads my heart back to where He wants it.  This makes me more able to glorify Him in many ways, being a wife included.  I am also reading Created to be His Helpmeet by Debi Pearl with a fantastic group of ladies from church.  The wisdom, encouragement and accountability in our group is phenomenal!
  • Planning Fun Time Together – This one is easy.  Or at, least this one sounds easy.  Play time with my husband is something that brings him so much joy!  He likes for me to poke him in the side when I walk by or tickle him when he is standing at the sink.  I can do that!  He also loves to just play – board games, card games, dominoes – and  I need to make sure those things happen.  Marriage should be fun!
  • Date Time Once a Month – This one is tricky.  We do not have extra money in the budget for this, and we do not have many people in our lives who are willing to watch our five young children for us for free.  However, this time together is important to our marriage.  We figure if we make it our goal to get out once a month, maybe it will actually happen once a quarter :)!  We do have some family and friends who are willing, and we need to allow them to bless us in that way!  Dates inside the house are also a great way to connect for free.

The whole idea, for me, this year is to make decisions that work towards my goals, and to avoid actions that don’t.  These written goals are my compass this year.  Make sure you subscribe to future posts, so you don’t miss any of my coming posts in this series.  Let’s encourage each other!

How are you doing in your role as wife?  In other roles?  What areas are you working on this year?  Tell us about it in the comments!

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Morning Quiet Time

Image by asha susan via Flickr

This year I am attempting to be much more intentional with goals.  You know, radical things like creating them and writing them down.  After reading several things in the past few months that convinced me that I really ought to have goals in order to actually accomplish things this year, I was a little lost as to how to actually begin.

I read Telling Your Time in one night, and found that it helped me immensely.  By the time I worked my way through the book, I determined what areas of my life I wanted to focus on, how I wanted to change, and how I was going to actually do it from day-to-day.

My plan is to share with you, one area at a time, what I will be working towards this year.  I’d love to know what your goals are for this coming year, and how you plan to spend your days to end up where you want to be!

Area 1: Myself

As the book told me to do, I asked myself the question, “What kind of Self (body, mind, soul) do I want to be?”  My answer?  I want to be merry in heart, contented, hard-working, accomplished, loving and organized.

And how do I plan to become that woman I want to be?

  • Manage My Time WellNot managing my time well stresses me out, being stressed-out makes me tense, which makes me short-tempered, which works directly against everything I want to be.  I will make it a priority to manage my time well, keep lists and have a routine to my days.
  • Rest and Sleep – Obvious, right?  Maybe.  But, for someone as driven and busy as I am, this is something I need to make myself do.  Tired Mommy is not as loving as rested Mommy.  I will get ready for bed at 11:00pm and set the alarm for 6:30am.
  • Time By Myself – I wrote an entire post on this here.  I realized this year, that time by myself is how I recharge.  And taking the time to recharge is not selfish, it is smart.  I cannot be the woman my family and friends deserve if I am drained and overwhelmed all the time.  Even if I never leave the house, it is necessary for me to carve out time in my week to read, research, look at recipes, etc. in a quiet place.
  • Time with God – Clearly I am not typing these in order of importance, as this one would be at the top.  More than I need quiet time by myself, I need quiet time with God.  This is where my soul finds rest and He speaks to me through his Word.  No, I am not saying that I hear the audible voice of God, but if I never sit and read my Bible and pray, I will never hear Him.  He is my source of strength for today and hope for tomorrow (as the old hymn goes), and where I need to come first for refreshment.  Quiet Time with the Lord at 7:30 every morning is essential for me.
  • Haircuts and Decent Clothes – Yes, this actually needs to be on my list.  Would you believe that it has been over a year since I had a haircut?!  Terrible.  I feel better about myself, meaning I have a brighter spirit and a better attitude when I am not embarrassed by my appearance.  Clothes that fit (hard to do when I have been every size in the book being pregnant and nursing for about the last 8 years) and a decent haircut are on my to-do list.
  • Regular Meals – Another one that should be a given, but just isn’t.  Sometimes it takes me so long to get meals ready, kids’ plates fixed, the baby nursed, and the baby fed – nibbling as I go – that I am just not even hungry anymore.  As a nursing mom, I cannot afford to eat lightly!  Being intentional about eating nutritious foods, often, is important.

Simple, really, when I write it down.  But, without writing it down, I know that I would continue to struggle with success in these areas.  I know they are a priority, and now I can clearly see why they are a priority.

The other part of setting goals for the year, and equally important as having the actual goals, is making my action points a priority in my day-to-day schedule.  I am not a “by the clock” kind of gal, but it has become necessary for me to at least have an outline to my day.  It gives me peace of mind that theoretically, everything that I think could happen, could happen on a perfect day.

Perfect days never happen, and that is OK too.  At least I know where to jump back in after interruptions when I have a routine to guide me.

Next up – Area 2:  What kind of spouse do I want to be?

What are your goals for yourself this coming year?

I am sharing this post at Gratituesday by Heavenly Homemakers.

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